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major(s): biology
Ugh!
Just take a minute to inspect my awfulness! I swooped in a mere 9 days before Woody and snatched up this lovely young girl with my hippie talons. Woody was convinced that, ultimately, the clear inarguable fact that he was superior boyfriend material would become self-evident… NOPE.
With great poise, he silently suffered such indignities as listening to the girl complain about how I used to copy her Bio homework; my obsequious Stoner Dude mannerisms; and one particularly harrowing social situation in which I hung out with him and her in my living room… PLAYING ALONG TO A LIVE PHISH SOLO ON HER ARMS!!!
No jury would convict Woody.
